Connect with your birth family
As you get older you might have questions about your health history, about your heritage, or just about the people who share your DNA. Or maybe your adoptive parents used to have contact with your birth family, but lost touch over the years. You may be able to resume contact and get your questions answered through reconnection with your birth family.
Reunion can be complicated, emotionally and logistically. Our team can help you make sense of your options, and if reunion is possible, we can help you navigate the relationship with your birth family and your adoptive family.
Reunion can be complicated, emotionally and logistically. Our team can help you make sense of your options, and if reunion is possible, we can help you navigate the relationship with your birth family and your adoptive family.
Give us a call with your questions about reunion.
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Can I legally contact my birth family?
If you don’t have their contact information, ASC will reach out to your birth family on your behalf and let them know that you’re interested in reconnecting. If you weren’t adopted through ASC there’s a state registry that allows you to request information about them.
If you have your birth family’s contact information, there’s nothing stopping you from reaching out to them. If you’d like support or for someone to make the call for you, ASC can help! Give us a call and we’ll start the process.
Please note, Indiana state law requires you to be over 21 years of age or have permission from your adoptive family to reach out to your birth family.
If you have your birth family’s contact information, there’s nothing stopping you from reaching out to them. If you’d like support or for someone to make the call for you, ASC can help! Give us a call and we’ll start the process.
Please note, Indiana state law requires you to be over 21 years of age or have permission from your adoptive family to reach out to your birth family.
Understanding reunion
Why does my birth mom want contact now?
Things change. Just because your birth mom chose not to have contact with you at first doesn’t mean she didn’t love you or care about you. And today, she might be in a totally different situation than she was in when she placed you for adoption.
Maybe something medical has come up, and she thinks you deserve to know about it. Maybe she has other children who want to meet you. Or maybe she’s finally processed the grief that comes with placing a child for adoption.
Whatever the reason, our team can help prepare you for reunion. We’ll help you manage expectations and navigate the relationship with both your birth family and your adoptive family.
Maybe something medical has come up, and she thinks you deserve to know about it. Maybe she has other children who want to meet you. Or maybe she’s finally processed the grief that comes with placing a child for adoption.
Whatever the reason, our team can help prepare you for reunion. We’ll help you manage expectations and navigate the relationship with both your birth family and your adoptive family.
Preparing your adoptive family
What will my adoptive family think about reunion?
Choosing to reunite with your birth family is an exciting time, but it can cause a lot of emotions for you and your adoptive parents. They might get sad, angry or defensive about the idea of you starting a relationship with “another family.” You might worry about disappointing them, or making your relationship more complicated.
In fact, those emotions cause some adoptees to pursue reunion in secret. They might exchange texts or emails with their birth family without telling one or both of their adoptive parents.
At ASC, we understand the complexities of feeling pulled by two different families. We think being open and honest is the best way to handle reunion.
In fact, those emotions cause some adoptees to pursue reunion in secret. They might exchange texts or emails with their birth family without telling one or both of their adoptive parents.
At ASC, we understand the complexities of feeling pulled by two different families. We think being open and honest is the best way to handle reunion.
Here are some tips for having the conversation:
- Have an open discussion about your thoughts, worries and hopes for reuniting with your birth family
- Have a support person you can feel safe in talking to, whether it’s an adoption-informed counselor or a fellow adoptee
- Remember, this is about your needs and what you need to feel comfortable in your truth
- Let ASC know how we can support you through this exciting time
IN Adoption Matching Registry
What if I wasn’t placed with the Adoption Support Center?
Indiana has an Adoption Matching Registry that might let you access helpful information about your adoption. You may be able to get details about your health, or even your birth family’s contact information if they’ve chosen to share it.
Indiana’s Adoption Matching Registry