| adoption grief

Pregnant and Cuffed

Can you place your baby for adoption while in jail? I have been in many hospital rooms while the patient is shackled to her bed with a jail guard close by. “K’s” adoption plan was about to take place. When I walked in, she was cradling her baby as tears ran down her cheeks. She … more »

A Half Truth is a Whole Lie in Adoption

Do I have biological siblings? Modern adoption has layers of emotion, grief, and beauty all mixed up. Adoption affects more than just the birth mom or the parents that adopt the baby. Society leads one to believe that once the papers are signed, everything and everyone is happy and goes on with their lives. The truth … more »

What to do when your child’s adoptive parents “GHOST” YOU

In modern adoption, families create a relationship to be as close as both parties agree to. Relationships take lots of work and ones created through adoption are unlike any other. There is a shared responsibility by each party to come together for the well-being of the adoptee. When connections are lost, or you get “ghosted” … more »

When you know better.

It’s 1999 and a 23-year-old woman was considering placing her baby for adoption. She was a single mom of two and had her mother’s support to consider adoption. She and her mother were looking at profiles but kept saying the same thing, “nothing clicked”. The adoption coordinator at that time, according to her notes suggested … more »

Let’s Get Uncomfortable!

I hear this phrase at the gym and I find it difficult to get out of my comfort zone. After work, the last thing I want to do is get my heart rate up and sweat. I give a dirty look to the coach but I keep working till my heart rate goes up and … more »

A perfect day to say Thank You…

Let me set the scene. I was very pregnant. Probably 7-8 months. I was starting to experience some swelling and water retention, pre eclamptic. Likely not feeling the best. Hormonal. Uncomfortable. Testy. Our ASC team was at our weekly staff meeting. I can’t remember exactly what we were discussing. And really, the specifics don’t matter. … more »

“He Has Never Asked”

After 22 years and 100’s of adoptions, they are coming back for answers. I started leading ASC’s post placement team in January this year. Once I dug in, I realized how much of a need there is. We have only just began to scratch the surface of my dreams for this project. I believe this … more »

“Now is not a good time”

Arguably, the most important work we are doing right now at ASC is post placement care. We’ve spent the last couple of years developing our post placement program and then continually changing and adding to it as we learn more. It’s a work in progress. Currently, it consists of a dedicated day each week, a … more »

Grief, my hidden treasure.

This Saturday is my dad’s birthday (May 30th). He’d be 65 years old if he were still here. He died suddenly, unexpectedly when I was only 3 years old. I’ve often felt I didn’t have a right to grieve the loss of my father, Owen. When I shared parts of my story or someone would … more »

COVID Statement

Dear Friends~ Everyone on staff at the Adoption Support Center is anxious to get back into the agency to collaborate and support all families in the adoption journey. As this is an evolving situation, we continue to monitor this situation in real-time to ensure the proper precautions are being taken so everyone feels safe. Since … more »