| Unplanned pregnancy

To: Boundaries From: Love

Holidays tend to amplify whatever already exists inside an adoption constellation. A quiet ache can feel sharper. A warm memory can glow brighter. A sense of connection might feel close one moment and far the next. Birth parents often carry emotional weight silently. Adoptive parents juggle logistics and emotional responsibility. Adoptees move through sensory intensity, … more »

I HEREBY RESOLVE…

So here it is, another new year. Welcome to 2019! For almost half of Americans, making a resolution for the new year is a part of the tradition of the holiday. These generally are self-improvement based…lose weight, add a fitness routine, improve personal finances, or stop smoking. Do these resolutions work? Do those Americans who … more »

My heart is full.

Today I watched the beginning of a miracle. Working in adoption is hard. It’s filled with joy, but it’s also filled with grief and brokenness. So much of the work done in adoption is done prior to the delivery of the baby. It’s careful consideration on the part of the expectant mother. It’s looking at … more »

A Four-Letter Word that Has No Place in Adoption

How careful are you in the words that you use? How careful are the people around you in the words they choose? Are there any words or phrases that make you uncomfortable? That are overused until they lose their meaning? There are many words used when talking about adoption. There are words that describe the … more »

Dealing with Fear in Adoption

Creepy Crawlies and Things That Go Bump in the Night- Dealing with Fear in Adoption. It’s officially fall and we’re officially into the month which celebrates Halloween. Halloween has become a bonanza for retailers, with some reports indicating that 179 million Americans spent $9.1 billion dollars on candy, costumes and decorations in 2017. Since 72% … more »

Should I or Could I?

Did you know that you talk to yourself almost all the time? Whether or not you are aware of your thoughts, our brains are working constantly. The things we tell ourselves have a direct impact on our emotions. One of the most detrimental words that we use is “should”. To say we should do something indicates … more »

Birthdays: From Bittersweet to Joy

The anticipation…complete with countdowns to the big day when “this many” fingers increases by one. The sound of paper being torn from the packages. The sticky fingers and face from the icing on the cake. The sounds of singing that simple little song—“Happy Birthday to you, happy birthday to you!” The glow of the candle. … more »

Dads—You Matter!

Check out the self-help section of any bookstore. It’s likely that you will find many of these books divided by gender. Maybe this all began with Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus back in 1992. Maybe it’s biology, maybe it’s society, or maybe it’s none of these things. But when it comes to … more »

The Home Study- What, When and Why

What do you think of when you hear the words “home study?” What is your picture of the person who comes to your house to complete a “home study?” The home study process can be anxiety producing, particularly if you picture a social worker from the 1960s wearing orthopedic shoes and reading glasses. Home studies … more »

Celebrating Birth Families

Where’s the joy? Where’s the excitement? When a new baby comes home, the baby is welcomed with banners, balloons, visitors, and gifts. In adoption, the adoptive family is swamped with people wanting to visit, hold the new baby and offer congratulations. But when a woman who has placed her baby for adoption returns home from … more »